Title: Hope, Courage & Triumph
Author: Connie Bent
Publisher: XlibrisUS
ISBN: 978-1-5245-0703-9
Pages: 180
Genre: Biography & Autobiography/Personal Memoirs
Reviewed by: Anita Lock
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Connie is unaware that her life is about to radically change. Alerted to a car accident involving her husband, the surreal moment turns into a horrific reality when she learns that her beloved Jimmie is in a coma—the result of a brain stem injury. Sixteen days later, Jimmie dies. At twenty-five years of age and the mother of two beautiful children, Connie is now a widow. Months after Jimmie’s death, Connie meets Jerry Bent. Although she has no intention of getting serious with Jerry, Connie realizes that she is quickly falling in love with the army dentist who hopes one day to become a board- certified oral surgeon. Wedding bells follow a year later. Yet soon after they settle into their new place, Connie notices that Jerry exhibits erratic behavior, such as lack of sexual intimacy, periodic bouts of anger, calling off work because of supposed sickness, and taking long naps.
What scares Connie the most is Jerry’s sudden Dr. Jekyll-Mr. Hyde mood swings and the way he treats the children. After some investigation, Connie learns that Jerry has schizophrenia. A constant battle working with his psychiatrist, Jerry is up and down with his medication. It doesn’t help that he over medicates atop of consuming alcohol. With increased erratic behavior, Jerry loses his chances of completing his oral surgeon certification program. Guns enter the picture, and at that point Connie has no choice except to equip her children in case of an emergency. The gun issue is short-lived even though Jerry’s mental illness continues to create more problems, such as impulse spending that begins to dry up their accounts. Eventually, Jerry receives help via a VA hospital. But just when Connie notices that Jerry appears stable, the unexpected happens once again in Connie’s life when she not only learns of Jerry’s suicide, but also that he had been misdiagnosed.
Connie Bent’s memoir—Hope, Courage & Triumph—is a bittersweet tale of accomplishment amid adversity. Bent’s story is one that has to be told. Because of its inherent Dr. Jekyll-Mr. Hyde qualities, mental illness is not readily noticeable in public and is often misinterpreted as an accepted anomaly. The real ones who suffer are family members since they see as well as have to deal with the full brunt of their loved one’s multi-sided disease. Taking readers back to when her tragedies first begin in 1968, Bent’s narrative is nothing less than heart wrenching. Bent keeps largely to a chronological plot, highlighting unsettling and often frightening moments that one would expect from a Stephen King novel. Unfortunately, the scenes are not works of fiction. This is the real thing, folks, and it’s not pretty, to say the least.
Amid a flurry of unnerving episodes, Bent balances her storytelling by weaving in lighter instances framed by happiness, whether genuine (holiday celebrations) or contrived in the form of diversions as a means to survival and sanity (i.e., going bowling or skating). Top on the lighter instances list as well as a highly encouraging shift in the narrative is how Bent turns her hardships into hope and healing through her clinical social work. Hope, Courage & Triumph is an uncomfortable yet absolute must read.
