Title: Living Life Unwounded: A Memoir
Author: Sydney Oliver James
Publisher: AuthorHouse
ISBN: 979-8-8230-1159-4
Genre: Memoirs
Pages: 295
Reviewed by: Allison Walker
Pacific Book Review
In her memoir, Living Life Unwounded, Sydney Oliver James invites readers on a deeply personal journey of resilience and faith through her experiences as the wife of a man suffering from manic-depressive, or bipolar, disorder. James’ compelling narrative takes readers on a rollercoaster of emotion. Her openness and honesty will connect with anyone who has struggled to help a loved one navigate their mental illness.
When Sydney meets Adam, she finds herself caught up in a whirlwind romance. Adam is thoughtful, generous and exciting. When he proposes to Sydney not three months after they start dating, Sydney says yes. Is this all moving a little too fast? Sydney asks herself as she simultaneously plans their wedding, prepares for Adam’s deployment with the National Guard, and renovates the house Adam talks her into buying with him. While the red flags show up early, Sydney, who has no experience with manic-depressive disorder, can’t exactly pinpoint why the hairs on the back of her neck are standing up. It isn’t until Adam is discharged from the National Guard, deep in the throes of a manic episode, that Sydney’s in-laws finally reveal the truth that was kept from her during their engagement: Adam has been suffering from manic-depressive disorder all of his adult life. What’s worse, Adam is in denial of his condition and, frustrated with medications that make him feel foggy or cause him to gain weight, he keeps skipping his psychiatric appointments and refusing to take his prescriptions.
Caught between loving the person she knows Adam can be but also fearing for her safety, Sydney is frequently asked to compromise her moral values in order to help Adam. With the encouragement and conspiracy of her in-laws, Sydney deceives Adam to get him into treatment, puts her health second to her husband’s, and isolates from her friends in order to preserve Adam’s reputation. In her memoir, James recounts the challenges of maintaining a life beside someone suffering from extreme, untreated mental illness. Her ability to convey the raw emotions of grief, confusion, and despair is haunting, drawing readers into the heart of her struggle.
One of the memoir’s strengths lies in James’ candid exploration of vulnerability. Rather than shying away from the wounds in her past, she embraces them, writing a story that prioritizes candid narrative. Through James’ keen observations, readers see the ways Adam’s friends and family respond to his illness differently; some with helpful concern, others by distancing themselves, a few evading responsibility by denying the seriousness of Adam’s condition. James’ honesty and authenticity create a profound connection with readers, making the memoir an engaging and emotionally evocative read.
At the end of her story, after years of living along Adam’s denial of his condition and subsequent manic or depressive episodes, Sydney files for divorce. In her memoir, she describes grappling with this decision, and the guilt and fear that accompanied it. Throughout, Sydney holds onto her faith in God and chooses to have compassion for Adam. This theme of resilience is beautifully complemented by James’ reflections on love and loss. The universality of this theme transforms Living Life Unwounded into more than just a personal memoir. James’ story becomes a source of solace and inspiration for anyone grappling with their own wounds.
James has crafted a memoir as emotionally gripping as it is uplifting. Living Life Unwounded stands as a testament to the power of healing, the importance of embracing vulnerability, and the resilience of the human spirit. More than a memoir, this book is a beacon of hope for anyone navigating the tumultuous waters of life’s challenges.