Title: My Personal War Within: A Struggle to Find Inner Peace
Author: Ted Bagley
Publisher: XlibrisUS
ISBN: 978-1-4568-7958-7
Pages: 179
Genre: Memoir
Reviewed by: Carol Davala
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Pacific Book Review
As a child of the Old South, Ted Bagley was raised by loving parents who emphasized strong family bonds, the value of a quality education, and a solid work ethic. But equally important during this 50 and 60s timeframe ensconced a racial unrest, the young Bagley was taught to respect people for their actions and behaviors, rather than pass judgment based on the color of their skin.
Early on in his life, Bagley experienced racial discrimination when he tried to attend a Sunday morning service at a white church in Birmingham, Alabama. Amidst threats of jail and orders from the police, Bagley and his group of fellow worshippers were turned away singing “we shall overcome,” a refrain that would become the popular anthem of the civil rights movement. The incident clearly left its mark on the young boy. That long ago remembrance became the impetus for Bagley’s delving into his own experiences of racial conflict, to ultimately be captured in his heartfelt and provocative memoir, “My Personal War Within.” In this compact yet compelling read, Bagley takes us along on his life’s journey. Here his inner conflicts move from the racial strife of the South, to the turbulent borders of Southeast Asia and the Vietnam War, then later to the slippery slopes of Corporate America. Along this path he highlights the ever encroaching concerns of prejudice, hatred, and separation that taint the world.
From a historical perspective, Bagley skillfully includes period details reflecting an era of the KKK, demonstrations, burnings, bombings, and the segregating Jim Crow laws. Here he lists several of the black/white restrictions. Whether pertaining to matrimony or the use of restrooms, education or attendance at public entertainment events, breaking these edicts could result in fines or imprisonment. When such laws were deemed unconstitutional, Bagley notes the actions of a determined Rosa Parks as a move towards solidarity. Later, appreciating the discipline of his Army stint, while it certainly was not a buffer for racism, he did see the battlefield as an equalizer. His question of “Why does it take adversity to bring us together?” is a truly poignant consideration. In the aftermath of the military, Bagley went on to pursue a business degree, and ultimately moved about the corporate world. Hitting a few bumps along the way and some proverbial glass ceiling tactics that forced his hand, today he holds a successful VP position with a California Pharmaceutical company.
There are momentary digressions from the book’s central focus. In one instance, drawing readers into the warmth and comfort of a home kitchen atmosphere, the author reflects on the featured food of a childhood breakfast. Bacon and eggs, biscuits and apple butter are items he notes now gone by the wayside, in light of present day diet and health concerns. Such memories lend an intimacy to the story, providing a sharp contrast to the harsh realities of the overall topical concerns.
Bagley effectively begins each of his life stage chapters with a memorable, reflective quote. Later he includes a final collective of extracts accrued over the years, feelings which made an impact in helping to crystallize his own thoughts and ideas. These run the gamut from the powerful, equalizing phrases of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and the poetic words of Ralph Waldo Emerson, to choice selections from the likes of John D. Rockefeller, Eleanor Roosevelt, Einstein, Helen Keller, and several unknowns.
Ultimately Bagley’s book succeeds in helping readers examine their own personal inner conflicts. Often our beliefs are rooted in the earliest influences of our development. While some battles along our individual paths may be lost, this author proves that solid foundations can help bring balance to our lives, and move us toward a goal of inner peace.
